5 Simple Tools to Bring Yourself Back Into Balance

Over the last few posts, we’ve explored:

• The fight or flight response — your body’s ancient alarm system.

• The window of tolerance — your calm zone.

• The signs that you’re outside that window.

Now let’s get practical.

Because once you notice you’re outside your window, the next question is: “Okay… so how do I get back in?”

The good news is, you don’t need complicated techniques. Small, simple tools — used regularly — can help calm your nervous system and bring you back into balance.

Here are five I share with clients (and use myself).

1. Breathe Like You Mean It

It sounds obvious, but when we’re stressed, our breathing changes. We take shallow, quick breaths — which tells the body we’re still in danger.

Slowing it down sends the opposite message: “It’s safe to relax now.”

Try this simple rhythm:

• Inhale through your nose for 4 counts

• Hold for 4

• Exhale slowly through your mouth for 6

Repeat for a few minutes. Most people notice their heart rate easing within moments.

💡 This is the technique I reach for in sessions when I feel my own system starting to buzz.

2. Move Your Body

When adrenaline floods your system, your body is primed for action. If you don’t use that energy, it just lingers — keeping you wired.

Even small movements help:

• A brisk walk

• Gentle stretching

• Shaking out your arms and legs

You don’t need a full workout. Just moving for a few minutes can release tension and shift your state.

3. Ground Yourself in the Present

When anxiety hits, your mind races ahead. When you’re shut down, your mind drifts away. Either way, you lose touch with the here and now.

Grounding brings you back.

Try the 5–4–3–2–1 method:

• 5 things you can see

• 4 things you can feel

• 3 things you can hear

• 2 things you can smell

• 1 thing you can taste

It’s a simple reset button for your nervous system.

4. Name It to Tame It

This one is surprisingly powerful.

Simply saying: “I feel anxious right now” or “I notice I’m shutting down” can reduce the intensity of those feelings.

Why? Because naming an emotion shifts activity in the brain from the emotional centre to the rational centre. It gives you back a little control.

💡 I often invite clients to practise this in session. The relief when they realise they can acknowledge a feeling without being overwhelmed by it is huge.

5. Reduce the Noise

Sometimes, the best thing you can do for your nervous system is to remove stimulation.

• Step away from your phone or computer

• Dim the lights

• Turn down the background noise

• Find a quieter space

Creating calm on the outside makes it easier to find calm on the inside.

What Works for You?

These tools aren’t one-size-fits-all. What works brilliantly for one person may not land for another. The key is experimenting, noticing, and building your own “toolkit.”

And here’s the really important bit: practice them when you don’t desperately need them.

It’s like training a muscle. The more you practise in calmer moments, the easier it is to use these tools when you really need them.

How Counselling Helps

These techniques are a great starting point, but in counselling we go further. Together, we:

• Identify your personal stress triggers

• Explore what pushes you outside your window

• Practise regulation tools tailored to you

• Work on widening your window so you can handle more without tipping over

I’ve seen clients go from living in constant survival mode to finding more balance, energy, and ease in daily life. It’s not instant, but it is possible.

Final Thought: Balance Is Possible

Being outside your window doesn’t mean you’re failing — it means your nervous system is doing its best to protect you.

But with awareness, practice, and support, you can spend more time inside that calmer zone.

Because life feels so much better when you’re not just surviving, but actually living.

👉 If this series has resonated with you, I’d love to help you take the next step. I offer a free initial consultation so you can explore whether counselling might be right for you.

Nigel Skinner | Enestee Ltd Accredited Counsellor | Specialist in Stress & Anxiety📍 Based in North Wales & Chester | Online sessions available🌐 www.enestee.uk📩 Free initial consultation available